It was for real …

“I just want to make sure this is what God is calling you to do and not an emotional decision,” my dad exclaimed these concerns to me shortly after I returned from my first trip, and rightfully so. I was known for acting on emotions. He then proceeded to say, “but if this is what God is calling you to do, I will support you.”

Let me just say, the support of my parents meant everything to me. I truly don’t know if I could have said yes without their OK.  So I took my dads concerns very seriously.  Was it Whitney’s emotions or was it Jesus’ calling?  I prayed and I prayed and I prayed some more. Honestly, I am still praying this prayer. “Not my will but yours be done.” And God has revealed to me over and over that He is calling me to the DR.

It was for real.

One thing lead to another and I was able to return to the village on November 19th. Exactly 2 months later, but this time I traveled alone.  I not only had the best week of my life but the day after I returned to Georgia, I was able to move back to my parents house to save money. Now I use the word “able” in this sentence because it was a huge blessing that my parents would allow me to do this. BUT it was not something I wanted to do at all. I loved having my own space and life in Roswell. (Even as I am typing this, sitting upstairs at my parents house, listening to my dad blow his nose, it still makes me sad to know I don’t have that life anymore.)

It was for real.

I spent my last night in Roswell with my sister and I will never forget us sitting on my back porch, listening to the river, and talking about how love compels. I was so happy there but the love I had for the people in the DR compelled me to give up my comfortable life.  I’m not sure if I would have really remembered the conversation we had this night if it wasn’t for what happened the next morning.

I woke up early and went to the dream center (as I do most Saturdays) and they began speaking on what compels us.The answer was always love. I believe the title of the sermon was Compelled By Love and the verse we read was 1 John 4:8, “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” I know this seems like just a coincidence, but to me, it spoke volumes. The fact that Jesus does these small things throughout my life, shows me how much cares about EVERY detail. He cares about every feeling, emotion, concern, fear, and thought we have. He wanted me to be confident in my decision to move home away from where I thought my life should be.

It was for real.

The next day at church, Cory spoke on Zechariah’s lack of faithfulness.  Zechariah asked God, “How will I know this is your will?” He asked this even after God had continually spoken to him and gave him every reason to believe.  A few hours later, I was asking the same thing Zechariah did.

Sunday nights have always been hard for me but this particular night was painful. It was the Sunday after a long break and I found myself in a room with boxes of stuff everywhere and no where to go or escape to. I had just moved the rest of my things home that afternoon.  I was getting so caught up in my thoughts when God reminded me of the sermon Cory preached.  Was I really questioning God’s Will after He had allowed me to have the most amazing, yet crazy, week of my life. He showed up in both BIG and SMALL ways and I was still questioning His will. He wanted me to know …

It was for real.

Fast forward 3 months … Today, it was the most real it has been. I quit my job. Without any idea of what my next job will look like. All I know is God has given me so much peace and I cannot wait to see what the future holds.

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